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California Knights ...


LateNightCable

Alright hoodlum, choose your gettaway car ...  

  1. 1. Alright hoodlum, choose your gettaway car ...

    • 2003 BMW M5
    • 2003 Mercedes E55 AMG
      0
    • 2003 BMW 760Li
      0
    • 2003 Mercedes S600
    • 2003 Range Rover HSE
    • 1985 Chevy Caprice hooptie with the 454


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I like to think of myself as the Carpassion king of odd ball topics, things you won't find on any other forum. I enjoy coming up with cool wierd stuff to keep you guys entertained. So in keeping with that line, I present to you a gritty little urban tale, starring you.

Just for the hell of it, I'll call it California Knights Vol. 12 :D .

I get to be B.J. the naked bartender, and I retain all rights to the script when it aires on late night cable :wink: . So don't be shy, everybody join in!

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Okay, heres' the scene. You're an experienced gettaway driver, a damn god one. Your Chanel wearing wife and your psychiatrist whos' sleeping with her on the sly will attest to that. You've been recruited by some old prison buddies to help knock off the Bank Of America on South LaBrea Avenue in downtown Los Angeles tomorrow morning.

Word on the street is, $5,000,000 cash will be breezing through there bright and early via Brinks truck. After this heist, your buds Mitch, Rob, Julio, and Stinky are calling it a day and hopping the next flight out to the Bahamas.

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And you? You're going to take your cut and disappear as well. Go someplace warm, but free of cops with a penchant for dropping by your house whenever. Enough of that!

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The only thing that stands between now, and then - besides your secret obsession for high heels and a prostitute named Brenda - is a mission, and for this mission you'll need a worthy steed. Fast, good in the corners, but inconspicuous and able to hold 5 guys and 5 million bucks.

You take a drag on your cigarette, rubbing the stubble across your face, reminding yourself to pick up another pack of Mach3's at the store. You survey the garage before you. Every gettaway driver needs a good gettaway car, so whats' it going to be?

* The BMW M5 with it's stealthy four door appearance, and muscular V8?

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* The Mercedes E55 AMG, with it's equally subdued demeanor? It has an

automatic, perhaps that would be a good choice.

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* How about the BMW 760Li or Mercedes S600? They're heavy, but fast and roomy, and they could knock fenders with L.A.'s finest if they had to.

* Or maybe the new Range Rover HSE. It has good moves, and the cops can't chase you off road.

85Landua.jpg

* Or maybe you should just take your old 85' Chevy Caprice with the supercharged 454. You've been through some battles in that hooptie. It would be a fitting farewell to drive it tomorrow.

Please explain why you would choose a particular car. then write where you would fly off to with your stash :P . And get a shave!

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Hey where the hell is the pic of the M5! :evil::lol:

I voted for the M5. It's sleek, sexy, holds more than 5, and is really fast.

I'd also go somewhere like australia and hit the famous beaches there and hook up with sum bitches.

Ok, I chose the S600. It is plenty big for 5 people and 5 mil. I don't know about you, but when I be robbing banks, I like to do it in style, and what better way? If I catch any heat, I got the power to bounce out. I'd be drivin through town, pamperin my ass with cooled seats in the California sun. Then I get to the private hanger and the airport and take out the G4 and be off, and up out to my castle just outside Prague to hang low. Thats where I count my score, after which I take out the Tuscan and hit some clubs till dawn. Then, on to the next job.

i'd take the M5, at 4,100lbs, it's plenty heavy to bang fenders with LA's finest, and my experience with BMWs is they take abuse. Furthermore, it is the best handler of the group, i could power slide through the LA streets, corner like gangbusters, and ditch the cops by manouvering, though it may not have low end like the S600 and E55, once up to speed it has the power, so once I'm out weaving on Hi5, i'd own. it isn't huge, but it is big enough for what we need, we can be tight for the getaway. the S600 and 760 are too big of targets, to clunky, you can't weave, i don't care about roomy, i'm the driver, i need a tool to suit the job, the best tool. My tool needs the extra flexibility of the stick shift. The range rover could off road, but the cops would have bigger guns than me on the road, i wouldn't make it far enough, the range rover doesn't have very good acceleration. And the old caprice? I don't care about good farewells, my balls are on the line, i want the best car for the job, the M5.

With my money, i'd run to ireland, buy a nice house, some fancy toys (the kind that go fast), and I'd join the IRA, so even if someone found out i jacked the money, no one would, nor could touch me for it, because that would be bad for everyone. that and i could be a part of the world's best humored terrorist organization.

Skyline would hit the Aussie coast and scoop some bitches, yeah, I'll bet you would :D .

It's good we're getting some diverse answers, I was hoping everyone wouldn't go for the M5, although I must admit I did. I was tempted to go old school with the Caprice. Gotsta represent da B-Body, Knowz what I'm sayin'?

But it's true, I need a car that can handle. Something that can weave around the Carollas' and the ice-cream men with ease, as well as haul out on the freeway. Now if I were the complete ruthless type, I might pack some heat and shoot my accomplises so I could take their cut too. Then dump their bodies in the hills. - But I'm not, and I wouldn't want to stain the leather, so I would bid farewell to Mitch and the gang, ditch the M5 ( sorry ) catch a taxi for home, and tell the free-loading wife to get on board or get out, 'cause damn it, I still love her.

After some crazy love making on the floor, we would pack some bags, and drive the hooptie to another town like San Diego. ( too much heat in L.A. right now if you catch my drift. ) We would crash the night in a cheap motel. Why we don't stay in the 5-star hotel across the way, don't ask. To make a long story short, our final destination would be a chalet in Switzerland for the time being, great place to stash some shady dough. If the feds come asking about my loot, the Swiss will say " mind your own business! " :wink:

No wait, thats' my robber alter ego. I would really ditch the free-loader wife, drive cross-country to New York, do a little shopping, then fly to France. Get a little farm house out there. Yeah, thats' nice. 8) :)

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